Joestar Brothers (ジョースター兄弟, Jōsutā Kyōdai), originally titled "The Absurd Event That Happened to Me That Year" ("その年わたしに起こった不条理な出来事", "Sono Toshi Watashi ni Okotta Fujōri na Dekigoto"), is the thirteenth chapter of The JOJOLands and the nine hundred seventieth chapter of the JoJo's Bizarre Adventure manga.
Summary
A flashback to four years ago begins, showing when Dragona and Jodio first became aware of their Stands. Dragona is fourteen years old and playing volleyball for gym class. A girl tells them to hit the ball to pass it to her, which accidentally strikes the side of her face. As their classmates start laughing, the girl begins laughing too. Dragona offers an apologetic chuckle, but the girl retaliates by smashing the ball into Dragona's face with much more force, causing a nosebleed. After threatening Dragona with worse consequences if they do that again, she declares that there's no way their team would win with them on their team and wishes Dragona would just disappear from the world.
Feeling dejected, Dragona later gets onto the school bus. However, none of the kids let them sit beside them, each having their own excuses. Dragona finds a seat at the back of the bus, but accidentally sits on ice cream. The girl who threatened Dragona earlier arrives and accuses them of taking her seat. She rants that they ruined her ice cream and demands that Dragona goes and buys ice cream for everyone. The teacher tells her to quiet down, but she pushes the blame, saying Dragona dropped their ice cream. The teacher then asks her to remind Dragona that eating and drinking isn't allowed inside the bus. He misremembers Dragona's name, but requests that they be nice to "Dragomi" since they just transferred to their school from New Jersey. The teacher notices a kid with a parrot inside the bus and lectures him since that isn't allowed in school. A male classmate tells Dragona that the girl's parents are extremely influential because of how much money they contribute to the school. They are able to manipulate the success of the teachers, the bus company, and the driver. He asks the girl to let it slide, but she continues accosting Dragona.
The girl suggests that Dragona could pay her back another way for now and rubs Dragona's crotch. She begins taking Dragona's clothes off, curious about whether they have male genitals, while other classmates giggle and take photos on their phones. The bully mocks Dragona for not wearing a bra and thinks they should wear one, so she grabs an eyelash curler from her bag, announcing that she's going to draw a bra on Dragona's chest. While one classmate holds Dragona down, she clamps the curler onto their nipple. Suddenly, Jodio shows up behind the bully, interrupting her harassment as a raindrop falls on her head. The teacher tries telling Jodio to get off since he's eleven and it isn't the elementary school bus, but Jodio asserts that he only came on to get his older brother since they're going to be walking home together. The bully finds Jodio creepy and mocks the brothers by saying they should be called sisters instead. As soon as she says that, the raindrop drips through her eyelid, causing her immense pain.
After leaving the bus, Jodio asks how long Dragona was being bullied for, but Dragona dismisses it as the girl just joking around. At night in their bedroom, Jodio stays awake as he hears Dragona in distress during their sleep. Dragona doesn't go to school the next morning, but Jodio heads to the school bus with Dragona's classmates inside. While he's standing outside nearby, he makes it rain onto the bus's door lock, trapping everyone within. Suddenly, a fire starts and quickly spreads. The kids, teacher, and driver bang on the windows as they attempt to escape while Jodio just watches them burn. However, he changes his mind when he sees a parrot inside try to fly away from the fire. Thus, he summons his Stand, making it rain inside the bus to put out the flames.
The next day, Barbara lectures Jodio for not studying. Despite being smart, his grades are the lowest of his class. She's also thankful that Dragona didn't go to school on the previous day. Dragona's teacher and twenty students were hospitalized with major burns, possibly due to arson. Dragona realizes that Jodio is the culprit and privately confronts him. Although Dragona thinks that Jodio is mentally ill and needs to be hospitalized, they thank their younger brother for saving them. Dragona was so relieved after the incident that they slept very well. Dragona hugs Jodio, promising that they'll become stronger. Dragona also advises Jodio to keep the whole incident a secret just between the two of them, without telling their parents. Dragona summons their Stand to slide the scar from the bully's eyelash curler around their nipple onto a spoon, causing the spoon to shatter. Dragona declares that this ability will be called Smooth Operators, while Jodio's is November Rain.
Dragona narrates this event as something absurd that happened to them. Absurd events can be extremely important moments in one's life despite the person having no responsibility for it happening. There might not be any reason for the absurd event, but they can be heartbreaking. A few months later, Barbara tells Jodio and Dragona that their father has left their house. He was fired from the insurance company he worked for. Although the arsonist from the school bus incident earlier hadn't been caught, the driver at the time was apparently sick with a high fever and was forced by the bus company to drive regardless that day. Since Dragona's bully was the daughter of the people that run the bus company, they forced the insurance company to pay ten times the usual amount to their company. Jodio and Dragona's father was driven into a corner and agreed to pay it. The insurance company pushed the blame onto him instead of questioning the driver's fever or why they had to pay so much. Due to this, their father decided he could no longer live in Hawaii. Barbara couldn't be of any help, nor go with him. Their relationship was already a bit strained originally too. She apologizes to her children and promises to work to support them.
Since Barbara was always a housewife, it was difficult for her to get hired for a job with good conditions. She was stressed from having to suddenly work two jobs while also raising two kids, alongside all the piles of phone bills and tax payments. The neighborhood gangs started picking on their family. Jodio would always worry about his family falling apart, but Dragona assures him that none of these situations are his fault, with the bus incident just being a random absurd event. Meryl Mei drives up to them, warning the Joestar brothers not to be traveling on such a dangerous street alone. Dragona says that they're going to meet up with their mom, but Meryl offers to drive them there, claiming she also has a 'win-win' proposition for them.
Back in the present, Meryl Mei is introduced to Charming Man. She claps, singing for all of them to turn off their cellphones. Meryl asks Dragona why she should trust Charming Man. Jodio whispers something to Dragona, then Dragona and Paco try convincing Meryl that he's a good person who just wants to save his younger brother. Charming Man explains to Meryl what happened to his brother and how he witnessed Rohan experimenting with the Lava Rocks. Rohan's interest in its capabilities is why he ended up buying a villa and bringing high-priced works of art from Japan with him. Rohan was only able to find two Lava Rocks, but one was destroyed. Dragona, Paco, and Usagi awkwardly cough since Jodio was the one who destroyed it. The Lava Rock they have now is just a fragment. Charming Man is sure that there should be larger ones higher up on Hualalai, but a company called HOWLER owns the land and prohibits entry to the area. That section of land is also where Mauka went missing. Charming Man believes that he's still alive and thinks that they could find out what happened to him if they can go there. However, whenever he would try investigating it, the police or mountain rangers would stop him, and he's now considered a suspect for having killed his brother. He is convinced that society itself is preventing him from searching for his brother. Usagi thinks that's absurd. Jodio twitches at the word "absurd" and repeats it, while Dragona stays silent.
Charming Man thinks that if they mimic Rohan by scattering bills around Hualalai, they could find another Lava Rock. Meryl expresses her sympathy for what happened to Charming Man's brother. She brings a bill to the Lava Rock and confirms with them that this bill will always end up coming back to her now on its own, no matter where she goes. She discloses that she knows the owners of the infrastructure development company HOWLER. Thus, Meryl announces that the gang's new mission is to claim the entire mountain as their own property by taking control of HOWLER's bank accounts, land, and company. They'll do so by bringing the Lava Rock close to the concept of the company's rights. The total worth should be over 50 billion dollars, and she plans on giving the members 4% each. Rather than being robbers this time, they will just have to get close to the land.
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Ultra Jump April 2024
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