Crazy Heartbreakers

"This is the story of those seeking what they've lost. What they've lost is so vast that they themselves can't fully comprehend what they've lost—resulting in them leading lives that seem to be running in circles... What will they find in the process? In a world that has been shattered, what will become of the pieces they gather? When faced with the cruel meaning of all this, how will they live? Yet, the boy who should be the core of this story is not at all interested in this question."

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Crazy Heartbreakers (クレイジーの悪霊的失恋 －ジョジョの奇妙な冒険より－) is a light novel written by Kouhei Kadono with the cover illustrated by Hirohiko Araki.

It is published by Shueisha and released on June 19, 2023. It was announced in the May 2023 issue of Ultra Jump on April 19, 2023. A manga adaptation of Kadono's story was illustrated by Tasuku Karasuma from December 2021 to May 2023.

Set between Stardust Crusaders and Diamond is Unbreakable in 1999, Hol Horse leaves from Egypt. He was once a subordinate of DIO and the Stand user of Emperor. Now working as a private detective, his goal is to find a bird that DIO had kept. Heading to Japan, as indicated by Boingo's prediction, Hol Horse ends up encountering a young boy named Josuke Higashikata. This is a story of those who are searching for what they have lost.

Prologue
In 1988, in the southern downtown area of Luxor, Egypt, a teenage boy named Noriaki Kakyoin is with his younger cousin when he encounters the inhuman creature DIO. DIO implants him with a flesh bud, an act that leaves Noriaki's cousin, Ryoko, frightened and crying. However, she then notices a parrot flying in the night sky, an unusual sight.

Dire straits
In March 1999, in Cairo's "Wilson Phillips Street," Hol Horse, who is now a private detective, is confronted by a bold young boy who warns him not to proceed further down the street. Hol Horse scares the boy away and enters an illusionary labyrinth controlled by Kenny G., which used to be a mansion belonging to DIO. There, he meets Mariah, and learns that the Oingo Boingo brothers are staying in Room 4U. Oingo is impossible to communicate with due to his sadness from being betrayed by a girl, so Hol Horse drags out Boingo from his hiding place. From Boingo's Tohth, Hol Horse learns that his destination will be in M Prefecture, S City, Japan.

In Morioh, Ryoko Kakyoin visits the grave of Noriaki Kakyoin, her deceased cousin. She feels downhearted about the Kakyoin family's ancestral tomb's planned relocation due to urban redevelopment. As she contemplates her life, she stumbles upon Boingo's comic book on the ground, which catches her attention.

Meanwhile, Hol Horse arrives in Morioh and experiences a culture shock as he encounters unfriendly locals. While facing a perilous situation with a possessed driver, he is saved by Josuke Higashikata, a boy with a bizarre hairstyle. The two have an initial misunderstanding where they assume each other were responsible for the car accident. However, after Hol Horse threatens to shoot Josuke's heart rather than his head so as to not mess up Josuke's cool hairstyle, Josuke compliments Hol Horse's cowboy appearance, leaving the latter bewildered.

Dazed date
In the past, Oingo and Boingo were born with Stand abilities and faced abuse from their parents due to being creepy. They ran away from home when Boingo was five years old and became town informants. Eventually, Telence T. D'Arby introduced them to DIO, who encouraged them to use their powers for him. DIO examined Boingo's comic book, but it failed to predict anything about the vampire, with all its pages simply saying "Useless" in distorted characters.

In the present, Boingo feels dazed without his comic book. Sitting in a corner of S Station, he feels useless and avoids interaction with people. He eventually introduces himself to Ryohei Higashikata, who he is able to communicate with in Japanese using his Stand's ability to understand any language. Meanwhile, Hol Horse and Josuke converse on their way to S Station, speaking about Hol Horse's various girlfriends around the world and the reason why he keeps a toothpick in his mouth. When Hol Horse asks Josuke why he's so particular about his hairstyle, he claims he doesn't need a reason. When they reach the station, the staff tells them that Boingo already left with Ryohei. Hol Horse also explains to them that he is looking for a parrot.

Ryoko also arrives at the station and witnesses an altercation with a biker gang. They harass an old woman, accusing her of scratching their leader's motorcycle. Guided by Tohth's predictions, Ryoko gets involved in between them. The gang insults her hairstyle, which she twists to her advantage by tricking Josuke, who was behind her, into thinking they were insulting his hair. Josuke severely beats them up with his Stand and then heals them afterward. The scratch on the motorcycle is also healed, which resolves the situation. Ryoko and Josuke engage in a conversation about their hairstyles, as she proudly explains to him that her hairstyle is "Kakyoin Hair".

At the police station, Ryohei learns that the driver involved in the car accident was a police inspector named Hiraoka. He leaves Boingo alone with a young police officer named Kazuki Karaiya, who struggles to communicate with him. Boingo notices that Karaiya is disappointed when he receives the report about Hiraoka being fine and that there are no victims from the accident. Moreover, the officer quietly sings to himself "Sing, sing, Ultimate Singer". Boingo sits in fear until Ryohei returns, and eventually shares his story about how he lost his comic book. Ryohei confirms that Boingo has a room at the hotel and steps out again. The other officers gossip about Ryohei's past about how he never got promoted despite his dedication to his job. Meanwhile, Karaiya shows interest in the comic book that Boingo mentioned.

Trivia

 * The novel begins with a poem from "Behind the Scenes" by Polish poet . The Japanese translation of the poem ends with the phrase "like an unbreakable diamond" (砕けないダイヤモンドみたいな).
 * Every chapter of Crazy Heartbreakers begins with a quote of Rohan Kishibe from his Pink Dark Boy manga.
 * In addition to Stardust Crusaders and Diamond is Unbreakable, Crazy Heartbreakers references all parts of the original JoJo's Bizarre Adventure continuity: Will A. Zeppeli's letter to Tonpetty (Phantom Blood), a vampire of Kars is the grandfather of Kazuki Karaiya (Battle Tendency), Polnareff asks Hol Horse if he knows anything about Italy (Vento Aureo), and Hol Horse rescues pregnant women from DIO's mansion who are implied to be the mothers of DIO's children (Stone Ocean).